Letting Go, Part 1

Whisper chills
Down the spine
Falling, calling
Silent pine
Reaching, grasping
Missing fine
Breathing lost
Malaligned

Facing void
Of emptiness
Looking down
Nothing left
Eerie face of
Nothing less
Than weary hopes
And dreary deaths

Stars swirl round
Absent path
Dissolving in
The aftermath
Life be gone
A new one had
Condolences
Forsaking sad

Claw marks mark
The Letting Go
No return,
This is known
Turn to face
Those wildest fears
Finally silence
All those years

image

Advertisements
Blowing Lonely Away

Blowing Lonely Away

Are You blowing in the wind, my Darling? Are You carefree and open to the sun? Are You breathing the fresh air of spring, Giving You new life to start again? Are You giving new hope to your heart, Filled … Continue reading

~ When Love First Encountered Us ~

You are away
But my Love keeps flowing
In Your silence
My desire keeps growing

Have I lost my Love
Soul forever?
Or only for the time
It takes

To postpone what
Should flourish?
Should I fear?
Should I cry?

Shall I ignore
The inner promptings?
Within is a sensible
Self that knows

You
With trust of
One thousand lifetimes!
I am Yours

Eternally
Then, Now, Later
But Now would be
A refreshing drink

Of water from the
Universe where Love
First encountered Us
Assigning the burden

We carry now
Too heavy for even
Two Hearts who Love
This much

I Can Nearly See You

I Can Nearly See You

I can nearly see the whole moon When I look up in the sky The brightness of the face there Mocks me from on high If I could reach and touch him I’d swing upon his brow And jump into … Continue reading

March Forth, Little Child

image

Come here, poor little child

You fell into the hole again, did you?

In spite of knowing better,

You fell prey to illusion

Poor, poor little child!

Do not cry for your ignorance

Simply learn what you need to

Pick yourself up and march forth!

You are still here

You have breath in your lungs

And blood in your veins

You aren’t finished yet

You have much to do

But do not worry, child

That which speaks within you

Sees from the mountaintop

I AM here guiding you

You are a good listener

But your following needs work

One step at a time I guide you

Do not leap because you think you know

Where I am taking you

Take the step given to you, then the next,

Then the next, then the next

I AM leading you where you need to go

Trust only Me

Desperate Measures

Desperate Measures

Please come to me Please! How I miss You Oh, so much! You’ve been gone From me too long! I’m desperate For Your touch! My face needs Your sweet warmth My nose needs Your fresh scent My hands wring Fervently … Continue reading

When Love Began

Goodbyes are hard
They separate two hearts
In Love as one
They mean that I don’t wake up next to You
And We are left with memories
Crawling across Our skin

Goodbyes are hard
So shall We not say hello again
To spare Ourselves from the pain
Of being torn apart?
Now You have another
And suddenly You understand
Why goodbyes had to happen in the first place

Goodbyes are hard
So instead of cherishing
The beauty of hello
I guess We will avoid it altogether
At least this time
Because safe must have been
What We were aiming for
When Love began

Who’s Left?

That title is a play on words… Who has left? She has. Who is left? Only me.

She keeps dropping bombshells but still won’t talk directly with me. She said She won’t be returning to the U.S. for the foreseeable future.

What?

But that’s not all.

She has met someone.

It was inevitable, a beautiful, strong woman like her.

I handled this news by drinking an entire bottle of wine last night (not something I recommend) and spent two hours typing a diatribe (I’m on a roll lately) of love and grieving to Her, asking if we could talk one last time.

She was online, but did not respond at all to my calls. Did she know I was online, too? I can’t say for certain, but I was as loud as one can be, virtually.

And, nothing.

I sent Her recent photos and updates of my children through email in between my drunken sobs.

This morning?

Nothing.

Now I have to get ready for work, attend to people who need my support. Hungover and emotionally shattered (quite dramatic, don’t you think so?), I have to go through this, to pull myself up and get over it already.

There is so much I have been processing about this, from joy for Her new life to feeling betrayed by this silence to not feeling allowed to have any feelings at all! She doesn’t owe me anything, after all. Not one word.

I just have to get through at least this day without crying in front of my clients. Please, send good vibes my way today. I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck and have to go about my day as usual.